The funny thing about cloud computing is that even cloud computing experts have a hard time enumerating the unique characteristics of the solution given this buzz-ridden name.  That is, software as a service, application hosting, web hosting, and server virtualization–concepts that have been around for more than a decade–are all ingredients in the cloud computing recipe, wrapped in the cellophane of Bill Gate’s long-in-the-tooth “utility computing” billing concept.

But the exact measurements of each ingredient–that’s where the experts start shrugging. And if the experts are shrugging at this late stage, then what SMB owner is going to pay the trend much mind, to say nothing of spending their hard-earned, highly-taxed dollars on the cloud?

“Well, these cookies look really good, but we’re not sure what’s in them exactly, and we’ve no idea how they taste.”  I wouldn’t buy one of these, and neither would you.

My definition of cloud computing is this: an unstandardized way to add computing power for situational, often experimental, applications over which the constituent has very little strategic interest or risk exposure.

That’s because cloud computing isn’t a well-defined, best-practice, productized, rigid thing. Indeed, from one cloud vendor to the next, the cloud is described differently.  One thing is certain, the biggest web service data centers in the world, like Google, Amazon, and Microsoft, got so big that, one day, an executive walked into the board room and said, “gee, there are times of day during which our infrastructure is hardly being used at all. How can we sell our excess capacity?”

The whole thing kind of reminds me of the waste gas utility market, the highly abstract idea that places a currency value on “carbon credits”, units of carbon dioxide that are “spent” during the process of, well, existing.  That is, if you’re a company and you exist, you’re “spending” carbon credits. In the process of your spending, your purchase is a “carbon footprint”, a virtual shadow of all the carbon you’ve put out during your pursuits. Never mind that carbon is already being produced, or that the majority of its production is something over which nobody has any control.

Oddly, though, the paradigm of spending doesn’t even apply to carbon, because what you’re doing with these credits, in effect, is depositing them (not spending them) into a debt account. This is how nations handle it, anyway. This debt account follows you everywhere you go reminding you just how inefficient your firm (or nation) is at using energy (well, if your definition of efficiency has to do with co2, rather than producing something valuable for people, but I digress).  And then, to make the strange even stranger, credit traders can bargain with you for your carbon credits.  If your account is empty, they can sell you some of their nasty baggage because there account is chock full of the stuff.  How exciting!

No?

Is there one thing that this system does to actually appeal to the rank and file business owner? To somebody like me or you?  Or do we just look at it and say, who thought of this and what does it accomplish at the end of the day?

So we come back to cloud computing, whose definition is a moving target and whose role in servicing the needs of a small business is, well, unknown at this point.  Like the carbon footprint system that some have envisioned as a way of combatting global destruction, the cloud computing model asks us to agree that a problem exists–even if we can’t see the problem.

Right, you say, Ted’s just a small business owner in Cleveland. He’s taking a very short view of the matter. Those who wonder what about the ‘real’ motivations of the Kyoto Protocol and Cloud Computing must be hillbillies, right?

The cloud exists because supercorporations have excess computing capacity. The cloud is touted as a solution because those supercorporations want to make money. Those are two indisputable truths, and nothing deplorable about them. But the notion I hear repeated–that the cloud has specific benefits for SMBs–is not verifiably true at this early stage.  Heck, it’s kind of fun to read various definitions of cloud computing penned by the pundits.  Some of this stuff reminds me of teenagers getting caught red-handed pulling a horrible prank, but trying to explain it to their parents, to whom the explanation just doesn’t add up. What is the solution?

If you’re General Dynamics or Lockheed Martin, cloud time may be of interest and value.  But if you’re an SMB calling the line of business app you run remotely via Citrix a use of the cloud, think again.  This really isn’t anything new. Hosted apps and remote computing are far different in scale and scope from what Google and Amazon are shooting for with the cloud.

Google’s strategy, at least as evidenced by the proliferation of web-smart devices and software, from ChromeOS to Android to Google Apps, seems to be to create reliance on a sort of federalized computing utility. Had Microsoft been so obvious about their desire to accomplish this precise goal back in the nineties when the DOJ was heckling them for bundling Internet Explorer, they’d have never survived antitrust. Indeed, if Microsoft had been open about their plan for computing singularity back then, they wouldn’t be around today for us to feel sorry for them over how far they’ve fallen from the top.

Of course, by federalized, I don’t mean it in the governmental sense, but in the participatory sense. The strategy of driving all private computing to one or two meganetworks controlled by a few scrappy startups from the nineties a la Amazon (hey man, we just want to sell books on the Internet, you want in?) may have value to those who need the power of 2,000 processing cores simultaeously, like Lockheed, just as a secondary market in carbon credits may have value to people hoping to profit from eco-energy concerns, like GE.

But to me and you, the small to medium business owner?  Well, we’re still not convinced.

Peter Csathy, the businessman and visionary behind SightSpeed and Vlip, has joined Sorensen Media, makers of the famous, pro-grade Squeeze video compression software, as CEO.  Peter let me know that he’s excited about his new mission as leader of the veteran software firm, and admitted that he’s been relatively quiet since SightSpeed’s acquisition by Logitech last year. I certainly wish Peter the very best in his new role–and I believe Sorensen is getting a bargain any way you slice it.  Congratulations Peter.

It’s that time of year again: tax time.  As we all pay buku to our local CPAs to fill out forms we’re either too incompetent or too uninterested to fill out ourselves, we cringe at the idea of a federal tax audit and dread dealing with IRS agents on the phone: people who won’t give you their first names and only want to be called Mister This or Mizz That.

At the same time, at least in 2009, Microsoft is introducingperpetrating the most ambitious domestic licensing compliance audit in its history, calling any company it suspects may be out of compliance and requiring them to demonstrate that they “own” all the Microsoft software they’re using.  Microsoft’s SAM group is using tersely-worded phone conversations and heavy-handed verbal and written threats about escalation, audits, and legal action in order to ensure compliance. Call it revenue preservation if you want.

I call it lawsuit bait and a huge waste of my clients’ time.  Yet, Microsoft isn’t going to wait until economic conditions have improved to do this. They’re hurting too, and the easiest way to shore up revenue is the horse technique: go back to the same trough and drink some more.  Call existing customers and make sure they’re loaded with all the licenses they could conceivably need.

This technique is a bit of a gamble, as those being audited are mostly volume licensing customers–precisely the type of customers who have been laying employees off the last year or so.  Indeed, these customers’ licensing requirements have in fact gone DOWN, meaning that, for many companies, the amount of Microsoft software that’s actually needed might be less than what the customer has paid for.  Of course, when I asked my SAM agent if Microsoft would compensate me for my time if we were found to be over-licensed, he promptly responded with a proverbial ‘hell naw.’

I then informed him that if he is going to make arbitrary decisions about how my clients’ consulting time is spend (it does take me time to fill out MS’s compliance paperwork properly), he needs to give me or the client more notice.  I can picture lean I.T. staffs whose projects have to be put on hold all because pouty Microsoft is throwing a licensing tantrum. So much for the server upgrade because Ballmer and the gang decided to foist this lofty audit on our I.T. guys. It’s more than a little absurd.

Microsoft, you’re going to piss off a LOT of customers with this behavior.  (Something tells me your biggest customers like NASA and General Motors aren’t getting harassed on the phone by a war-dialing twenty-something with an autographed copy of Introduction to Microsoft Licensing on his book shelf.)

Bottom line, is if you’re going to show up out of the clear blue, and require something of my time, ie. boss me around, you better be either the IRS or my Mom.  Those are the two people for whom I jump through hoops.

I’ve gabcasted a new discussion between Katie Knight and I about the state of the newspaper business and its transition to electronic distribution. The main question: should newspapers attempt to build or participate in social networks?

Social Media and Newspapers #1 – Newspapers and Social Networking: Bridging the Gap

How do newspapers embrace social media in order to retain and grow their content audience?

Listen now.

As an independent consultant and service-business owner, these challenging times (especially here in the midwest) have reminded me what makes a business successful.  I’ve enumerated the elements of my business’s success here–they’re difference-makers for me, and the reasons my firm will outlast our competition during this downturn:

1 - Place customers’ needs above everything. Don’t want to take a call for help on a Saturday night? Tough, your customer is in trouble and they need you.  So put on your snow boots and go help them.

2 – Call your customers even when they’re not calling you.  Demonstrate concern even when there’s no money changing hands.  It will come back in the form of more business.

3 – During lean times, no customer is too small, unless they take your attention from a bigger customer.

4 – Use inexpensive labor resources to decrease your customers’ costs–before they do it on their own.  When a lot of good unemployed talent is on the street, you can take advantage of that talents’ recent availability in order to drive your customers costs down.   It’s called outsourcing, or as I prefer to put it, localsourcing.  You provide less expensive labor options for your clients and get a bigger chunk of their pie at the same time.

5 – Spend money on marketing.  Yes, don’t shrink away from the guerrella marketing attitude that got you to your current success plateau just because there are economic clouds raining outside your office window.  In fact, marketing is received more postitively in a tougher economy that it is when things are hot.  When times are tough, your potential clients are more likely to switch vendors, so don’t stop marketing to them, and maybe they’ll switch to you.

6 – Reward business growth more heavily than normal.  Motivate your business development resources by giving them even bigger rewards for growth.  Assuming you’re not already in the red, put your money where your mouth is and remind your employees that “we’re in grow or die” mode.

7 - Retain your best people.  During downturns, good salespeople are going to get recruited while poor ones will get kicked to the curb.  Keep your best people happy, productive, and let them know how much you appreciate them–so you can keep them out of job interviews.

8 – Only take profitable work.  Don’t get caught in bidding wars just to keep your labor resources working. When we come out of this slump, you’ll regret the burden of a bunch unprofitable work that you took on just to keep your people employed.

9 – Outsource, outsource, outsource.   I already suggesting providing outsourcing.  Now practice what you preach and use it, too. Give your specialized internal projects to a local firm. That new in-house trouble-ticketing system?  That server upgrade your I.T. guy has been putting off?   Shop them locally and you’ll be pleased with the results you get by using a specialist.

10 – Invest in competitive advantage.  While your competition “waits it out”, invest in technologies and alliances that will bring you out ahead.  This might mean refitting your computer network or putting that new customer contact management solution in–so it’s ready to rock when the downturn comes to an end.

The Lorain County Chamber ran a great story about Best Technology Strategy on their home page today:

Despite the difficult economic climate in northern Ohio, and an abundance of well-entrenched competitors, Ted and his business partner knew that Best Technology Strategy was going to be a success. Picking the company’s area of specialty was the first challenge. Networking and helpdesk support seemed to represent the greatest need among Lorain County businesses, so that’s what the firm started with.

Check the rest of it out.

The iPhone was released to retail during the summer of 2007.  That means, if the features conspicuously missing from the iPhone at the time were in fact missing due to bugs, then Apple has had well over a year and a half to resolve those bugs.   Yet, in January of 2009, our iPhones still can’t send media messages, and they still can’t record video.

Moreover, any attempts to develop apps that accomplish video recording and storage or media messaging using MMS have been blocked by Apple’s Appstore Nazis.  Why?

Does Apple have something so incredibly cool up their sleeve that they’re forcing would-be competitors to the sidelines while we all waiting in Lemming-like anticipation?  I doubt it.   If Apple had something that slick and revolutionary–having to do with mms–they wouldn’t need to worry about competitors or imitators in the app store, would they?

Seriously, it’s ridicululous that I can download a multimedia Fart catalog from the app store but I still can’t take video or mms on the iPhone.

From friend Esme Vos:

Freedom to Connect, the annual event organized by David Isenberg, will be held on March 30-31, 2009 in Washington, DC. I am partnering with David to make this event fun and informative. This year is a very important one because President Barack Obama has made wired and wireless broadband – its cost, quality and availability – a major issue for his administration to tackle. Broadband is, in the eyes of the new administration, not just there for its own sake. It is a necessity for improving our lives: from the education of our children to the reduction of social isolation among seniors to efficient management of our energy grid.

There will be a lot of new people in Washington D.C. and as you have seen from the Inauguration ceremonies this week, there’s tremendous energy pushing for change. In the past, many of Freedom to Connect’s attendees have come from the FCC, various federal government agencies, the Congress and the Senate. This year we will see many new faces. We need to have a dialogue with them about the future of broadband and technological innovation in the United States.

The key topics for discussion include:
on-line, network-enabled industry and culture, new jobs and sustainable growth;
Burlington VT, where muni fiber enables business, artistic endeavor, and new telemedicine applications;
how Lafayette, Louisiana’s community came together as it built its muni fiber network;
the twin cities of Cedar Falls and Waterloo, Iowa, where one twin has a muni net, and the other doesn’t;
what municipal CIOs are planning for Seattle, Portland and San Francisco municipal fiber networks;
city nets, wired and wireless, that didn’t work – what went wrong and what we can do better;
what President Obama’s infrastructure and economic recovery plans mean for tomorrow’s network.
Sascha Meinrath (New America Foundation) and I will discuss in great detail what caused the municipal wireless networks in Philadelphia, San Francisco and other cities not to be built. Call it a post-mortem. It’s important for us to know what went wrong so we don’t make the same mistakes. We will also identify the key areas where cities and regions can use Wi-Fi networks not just to deliver public Internet access but to improve municipal and county services.

Among those who have already confirmed attendance to F2C are the CIO of San Francisco, the CTO of Seattle, the Commissioner of Telecommunications of Massachusetts and the Chair of the Vermont Telecommunications Commission, and 20-some other important shapers of the Internet who care about using it to spur economic growth, enhance participatory democracy and make our planet greener.

Get all the details, and sign up at http://freedom-to-connect.net.

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